Surrendering to God- Our All

If you know me, you know I am a Southern girl. I was born and raised in a small county in Mississippi, the Southeast part to be exact. I never dreamed of actually living in a big city full time,maybe for a limited time,but not full time. I love lots of trees. I love open skies. I love quietness. I love the country. Creeks,rivers,ponds,fields of grass,and patches of flowers. I love the laid back,slow paced country life. Guess where I live? You guessed it, the city. A big,noisy,busy city. Ironic? Yes. Coincidence? No not at all.

It all started when I got married. The man I grew to love was training to be a Highway Patrolman in Alabama. We got to pick 3 counties to be relocated in after he graduated. We were only engaged at the time and really had no clue where we would be put. We just had to trust God would place us where He wanted us. Part of me wanted to move to the mountains of North Alabama and just start completely over. The other part of me wanted to just move across the state line to Mobile County, just 45 minutes from our hometown. I was a clueless young woman and had no idea what God would do in our lives. I felt it had to be something big,something huge,something extraordinary. By God's will, we were placed in Mobile County. We had no clue what a blessing this would be in many ways.

Our journey of surrender and faith began to unfold once we wed in December of 2006. We were not placed at our apartment by chance either. Our landlord has been used by God so much to bless us in big and small ways. I don't know if she knows that or not,but she's been a blessing. We long for the country again and to be close to family and friends. We long for our boys to know what we knew growing up. Endless days in the summer sun,cold winter nights building fires in the backyard. They haven't known that yet to the extent that we have. Not all is lost though.

Surrendering to God is not easy,ever. It always means dying to something you want or desire. But it also means God opening up doors you would have never seen if not giving up your desires. God has given us more than we could have ever asked for. He has worked in ways we would have never known. We have seen his provision countless times in big and small ways while living here. At times I want to scream. I want to just leave and move somewhere that would seem easy for us. Some days I want to have the "easy" life,as if any life is easy,but that is what we think as people. We think someone has it easier by seeing pictures on Facebook or reading their blogs. We all have trials,struggles, and problems we will face in life.

God knows what we desire as a family,but He knows what we need as a family. It says in Isaiah 55:7-9 that His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. We're still living in the city watching God do miracles. I am reading Pain Redeemed by Natasha Metzler,if you haven't checked our her site you really need too. A line that stuck with me from the book is this: Every miracle contains sorrow,for without pain there is no need for a miracle. But they also contain redemption. God is using my husband in many ways in his job. God is using us in our church. God is molding us and shaping us to what He wants right here in the city.


Even though we may not get everything we want,we can take refuge in the One who does know everything we need. He's our strong tower. He's our refuge. He's our very present help in times of trouble.

Where is God calling you too that maybe you don't want to go? It could be a physical place or a spiritual place in your walk.


Linking up with Time-Warp Wife for Titus 2sdays.

He Will Meet Our Need

This is a verse that over the last 5 years I have been learing. It's not been easy to learn God will truly supply all that you need. It's hard. It's tiring. It's glorious. We're a one income family and that can be tough. At times I have thought about trying to bring income into the home. When I tried to do so,it failed. I would get so frustrated. I couldn't understand why it would not work for us. I finally just backed off the idea. God had always taken care of us no matter what. I don't know why I couldn't just let Him continue to do so.

I have been reading Pain Redeemed by Natasha Metzler. If you have never read her blog, you have too. She is so inspiring and is very gifted by God when it comes to writing. In her book she talks about miracles. That's when it struck me. When we try to meet our own needs, we miss the miracles of God. That's not to say we cannot try to make extra money,but sometimes God may not want us too. He wants us to trust Him completely. I kept thinking if I could just make a little extra money making jewelry we could start saving more a month, but God saw differently though. When we don't trust God with every area of our life, we can miss some very amazing things He wants to do. There were many times when we were first married that I wasn't sure at times about certain financial issues. God did above and beyond our needs. Just last year I had to have mouth surgery and it was going to be quite expensive. I had to go to an oral surgeon and was so scared of the cost. It was much higher than I thought too,but God took care of all of it except $283 exactly. Then, we got a refund for a hundred dollars in the mail. I was so thankful and so surprised. I shouldn't have been surprised. God loves us and He wants to meet our needs. God just wants us to trust Him.

We're waiting to find a home now. It is so draining at times. We found one that seemed perfect. It was so us. We started on the process and God put a halt to it. We hit that brick wall pretty hard. We both were so bummed and upset. We knew that we shouldn't push it though. It was almost like God pulled the carpet out from under us. The only thing I keep hearing from God is wait. I'm not a very patient person,even after being a Mother for 5 years. I have no clue when God will move us or if He will. I am trying to be content where we are in our very small apartment with 3 boys. I believe if we are faithful in small things, God will make us ruler over bigger things. So that is what we are doing. Easy? No. There are days I want to scream so loud get us out of here! It's a small apartment with 5 people and it can get cramped. We love hosting people,but that also can be hard at times. God knows best,I just have to remind myself of that daily every second of the day.

My parents raised 3 kids in a small 2 bedroom mobile home until I was in the 7th grade. We moved into a larger mobile home,but still only a 3 bedroom. I know God will sustain us if He sees fit for us to live here longer than we want. It's not easy praying God whatever You want with this house situation. It's much easier to pray Lord, show us the house you want for us. Isn't that part of dying to self? Praying God's will over our own no matter how hard it is. Refinement is not easy,but it is necessary.