Smiling At the Future

I have to admit that sometimes I fear the future. I fear what could happen tomorrow or twenty years down the road. I fear things my children may have to endure from heartbreaks to broken bones. We can never know what the future holds. It can catch us by surprise with good and bad things. God has been really dealing with me about worrying about what my future holds. At times I just wish there wasn't any turmoil in the world and it would be a place of peace and comfort.

Come join me at The Imperfect Wives today as I share some of my heart.

Turning 31: Moving Forward,Not Going Back

Today is my birthday. Sometimes I forget how old I am,anyone with me? It's hard to believe that I am 31 today. Thirty years ago today I came into this world. I am happy that God has given me thirty years on this earth,but I am a bit sad too. I am growing up and I finally feel like an adult. No one ever told me that growing up meant you were growing old. I always longed for the day that I felt like an adult,well it's here.

God has been more than good to me my time here on earth so far. He is a faithful God. He protected me through some dangerous times and has brought me this far. I am blessed with an awesome husband and 3 wonderful little boys. I'm healthy and I am happy. I never thought I would be where I am today,but I am very thankful that I am.

Looking back I had no clue what God had planned for my life,but I thought I did. I thought I knew who I would marry. I thought I knew where I would be living. I thought I knew what I would be spending my days doing. I thought I would marry such and such. I thought I would be living in some foreign land (Honduras particularly). I thought I would be doing mission work. Wow. Was I wrong or what? Aren't you glad we serve a mighty God? He is all knowing and He has best in store for us. He knew before I was born on February 20,1983 what I would be doing everyday of my life. It's wild to think He knows what each one of us will do each day we wake up. It is so comforting too.

I don't have what I thought I would have 10 years ago,but I am so glad that I let God lead my life. It was hard at times. I rebelled many times and did things my way. I went with my feelings instead of the peace of God,yet He was merciful to me. He some how kept me from making a lot of horrible mistakes that would alter where I am today. There is no doubt in my mind that I am right in the middle of God's will,what He desires for me. Oh what sweet victory! God has been giving me some desires of my heart since this year began. It's so amazing and I am so unworthy of it all. I began writing with a devotional site online, Laced With Grace. I will also be venturing out and writing for another site,a ministry reaching out to wives, called The Imperfect Wives. I would have never dreamed I would be doing this. I feel the most weak in my life right now. But that is what God wants. He wants to use me when I am weak,so He can be strong through me.

At times, I do long for the foreign mission field. I would be lying if I said that I did not desire to do that someday. God had a whole lot of work to still do in me. I have been through some stuff the last 10 years that has shaped me and molded me. My husband and I have been through hard times (not necessarily with one another) and God has really shown His might. He is a good God. He is a faithful God. He is a Mighty God. I am so glad that He is my God.

I look forward to the next year of my life and what God has in store for me and for my family. I have some things on my heart and some things I want to do. I am just trusting God to bring it to fruition. He is a God of purpose.

How do you celebrate your birthday? Do you reflect back on your life much?

        

Looking Back and Going Forward

It's almost 2014. Wow. Another year has come and gone. I look back and I can smile about some amazing things that happened,but I also get sad about things that did not happen. I get very sentimental around the end of every year. I think of dashed dreams,false hopes,and have many regrets. I tend to be hard on myself come the last few days of December. I think of the doors we thought would open for us that were just slammed right in our face. I think of the dreams and aspirations we had,but they never came to pass. I take it in stride and know God has the best interest and plan for our family. It's hard to accept at times, though. Letting the God of the universe orchestra my life,the big picture. It should not be hard,I mean He only created the world in just 6 days. He took dirt and made man. He took a rib and created woman. It is ridiculous that I cannot trust Him with the minuet and big details of my life. The world is a pretty big deal,so why can't I trust God with my big deals at times? It's a part of a process of learning and growing. One I am still learning.

I also think of the awesome things that happened this past year. We were able to go to the beach twice and it costs us hardly anything. We were able to go to Texas and it cost us nothing. We aren't big spenders and this was only our second year to take a vacation since the 7 years we have been married. We made memories with our boys that will never be forgotten. The year was not all full of sadness because in the dashed dreams are God's dreams,God's plans for us. How much better they are! His plans are perfect and there are without flaw! So I can take comfort in His Word and know that by allowing my dreams to slip away,He is putting new dreams into my heart and soul. How amazing! I really cannot say enough about the goodness of God. Surrendering to His will is not easy,but it is so worth it. I am a frail,flawed human and I know I will mess things up. So by surrendering it to God I have full assurance things will be just as He desires.

Closing this chapter of life,I look forward to the new year. I look forward to making more memories with our boys at home and wherever God takes us. I look forward to growing more in my faith,being stretched more,being pruned more,and being broken more. I look forward to seeing what God does in the hearts of my boys and the hearts of family, plus friends. I look forward to see what doors God closes and what doors God opens. Like the song by Darlene Czech says, I give my life to the Potter's hands. There will be bad and hard times. For without them, how would I know the goodness of God? There will be joyous,happy times too. He will give and He will take away. But I will say blessed be the name of the Lord.

If I am full of myself I have nothing to give,but if I am full of Him I have so much to give others. So I want to be broken and continually filled with the glory and light of God so I can give to others what God knows they need. I encourage you to seek God whole heartily with all that you have. Let Him take dreams of your own and replace them with what He desires. Let Him break you so He can fill you with Himself. May we be women of prayer,conviction,love,and so much more. I pray you all have a blessed last day of 2013 and have a blessed new year!

Linking up with Darlene @ Time Warp Wife for Titus 2sdays.